review 005

note: I only reviewed your Encyclopedia since your layout seems to change constantly. As stated in the rules, drastic layout changes will pull you off the waiting list, but because I was extremely late on this entire review I have posted up my review on your Encylopedia section.

The Encyclopaedia
I find it strange how you keep switching back from the word varients of color to colour (as well as other words such as parlor/parlour and using the term shoppe. The manga was translated into United States English so why do you try to use the British variants? Shoppe isn't even a present day word people use in Britain...it's an OLD English term). Many of your entries start out as fragments. I understand how some of them are just suppose to be definitions, but I just wanted to point that out. There are also many cases where you say one thing, but you do not apply it to the rest of your entries. In example, you note early on in "B" of the Black Moon Family is incorrectly named, but that they should be the Black Moon Clan. Yet, all your other entries that mention the Black Moon Clan you call them the Black Moon Family. You are just contradicting yourself in your entries when you do this. There are a few name issues such as Zoicite...you spell it three different ways Zoycite, Zoisite, and Zoicite randomly in your entries...choose one. You also have a tendency to have spacing in names or you don't have them i.e. Sailor Moon and Sailormoon or ChibiUsa and Chibi Usa you often use both, switching back and forth in all your entries. Keep your entries consistant, it basically confuses your visitor more with all the varients.

A- Adonis - spelled "Millennium" wrong. Aluminum Siren - I understand why you label her correctly as Seiren, but you cannot say that Siren is incorrect. Seiren is only how the word is pronounced. It's almost indicating that if we were saying Usagi we would then spell it out as Oosagi in English. So Usagi is incorrect because in English it's pronounced as Oosagi. Japanese and English translations are always a difficult task. The official English manga labels her as Aluminum Siren (although I admit their translations are not the best, they did decide to label her as Siren...you could note in your entry). Amazon Stones - you indicate that the Amazoness Quartet is not the correct spelling but should be called the Amazones Quartetto (in a later entry)...so you should spell it the way you think it is in all the rest of your entries, including this one. Amazoness Quartet - again the problem of calling something incorrect when it technically is not. Amazoness Quartet is the correct translation into English of Amazones Quartetto (which is the Greek term). Amazones Quartetto is correct, but this name was never used in any BSSM products. Amichan no Hatsukoi - spelled "that" in the sentence "Chibiusa asks the spirit who she is...Ami interrupts and says the it's Mercurius!" Amy Anderson - spelled "embarrasses" wrong. Animal Kingdom - spelled "sanctuary" wrong.

B- Bertie - "When Bertie is about to win when Prizma and Avery arrive to take credit for everything. " is a fragment. Black Moon Family - you somewhat contradict yourself in saying the term is incorrect but then a few sentences later indicate that the term clan is "preferrered." Preferred isn't the same as correct. Bourdu - grammar issue "becomes" Tuxedo Mask. Burning Mandala - spelled "spreading" "actually" wrong. Grammar issue "a stream of firey rings is shot from her hands."

C- Camille - Chibi Usa...to space or not to space...doesn't really matter, but try to keep it consistant with the rest of your encyclopaedia where you did not have a space between her name...until now. Channel - spelled "fictitious" wrong. Chronos - is the Greek god of time...but he's not the father of Zeus. He's very often confused with Cronus (who did sire Zeus). Cosmic Heart Compact - spelled "the", "senshi", "extremely" wrong. Crane Master Joe - spelled "Kingdom", "existence" wrong. Crown Game Centre - spelled "entrance" wrong.

D- Danburite - spelled "Sailor" wrong. Dead Scream - Take out that extra period puncuation in the quote "Dead...Scream!" Diana Fairy - "Fragile like a teardrop" is a fragment and "side note" is two words. Doom Tree - spelled "energy" wrong.

E- Evil Spirit "Disperse" - is it suppose to be dispursed, a made up name by Naoko, or is it just incorrectly spelled? I don't know ^_^

F- Fanatastic International Music Festival - double "the". FM No. 10 spelled "station" wrong. Fruit Parlour Crown - the word "shoppe" is an Old English term for shop.

G - Galactica Scales - spelled "attack" wrong. Galactica Tsunami - add a hyphen in "Orang-ish" since it's not a real word. Galaxia Palace - "After the graveyard, the Star Gardeners, Chi and Phi are what's left." change the what's to who are...they aren't things...they are people. Generic Daimons - spelled "defense" wrong. Grandpa/Grandfather - spelled "with" wrong. Group of Seven Youma - spelled "existence" wrong. Guccicci - spelled "fictitious" wrong.

H - Hachidori no yosei - spelled "faerie" wrong. Hammer Price Shrine - it's "pawn shop" not pawnshoppe. Henshin Brooch - spelled "front", "encounter" wrong. Hercules - blueish isn't a word, change to "blue-ish". Hurdle Line - spelled "device" wrong.

I - Infinity Academy - spelled "volume" wrong.

J - Jack It Up! - spelled "the" wrong. Jinta Araki - spelled "instructed", "Mimete" wrong. Juuban High School - you state "Haruka & Michiru" don't use an amperstamp (&) in a sentence. It's only used for titles/companies etc. but never in a sentence. Juuban Matsuri - spelled "occured", "ascertain", "extracted" wrong. Juuban Medical University Hospital - spelled "episode", "unconcious" wrong.

K - Katsutoshi Yamada - "...Sailor Neptune, after she attacked the daimon who captured it with Deep Submerge." The sentence sounds awkward...remember "it" refers to the closest subject, in this case it's the diamon that's using Deep Submerge and not Sailorneptune. Kijin Shibakawa - spelled "plants" wrong. Kitakata - "tight roping" is two words. Kurozuishou - spelled "Imperial" wrong.

L - Leo - "lion-like" is hyphenated. Love Letter Attack - spelled "villain" wrong. Luna Ball - spelled "occasionally" wrong. Luna Sphere - spelled "occasionally" wrong.

M - Malachite - spelled "original" wrong. Maripannu Castle - spelled "castle" wrong. Masanori - speled "home" wrong. Maya Touno - spelled "health" wrong. Mercury Bubbles, Blast! - spelled "Japanese" wrong. Mermaid, Planet and Mermaid, Sailor - be consistant with your spelling of Aluminum Seiren. Monster of the Day - spelled "villains" wrong. Moon Fairy Diana - "Fragile like a teardrop. " is a fragment and "side note" is two words. Moon Tiara Stardust - spelled "posessed" wrong. Mugen Gakuen - You don't need to have that comma after Michiru Kaioh's name. Spelled "Michiru" wrong. Mythology - spelled "Forgetfulness" and "everything" wrong.

N - Naoko Takeuchi - "super heroine" is two words. Nemesis - you call them the Black Moon family...but in your previous definition you indicate that they should be a Clan. Stick with your interpretations if you think they are correct. Nerima Open Music Hall - spelled "occurred" wrong. Nijizuishou - spelled "existence" wrong.

O - No errors yay! =) I like how you explain the Outer Senshi term, very informative.

P - Papillotes - spelled "BonBon wrong where it says "they transformed into..." Patricia Haruna - spelled "Eighth" wrong. Pet Shop Perfume - spelled "increasingly" wrong. Pharmakon - get rid of the extra "for in "Black Moon Family had been searching for for so long." Also fix "pharmacon has" in the 2nd to last sentence. Planet Girls - "rip-off" needs a hyphen.

Q - just a note...you constantly use Queen Selenity in your entries when you refer to the past Queen Serenity, but in this page you call her Queen Serenity. Please figure out which name you wish to call her. In the manga, Naoko notes that the people of Earth know her as Selenity of the moon, but she is actually Queen Serenity.

R - Rainbow Crystals - Remember to capitalize "Because." Spelled "existence" wrong. Reika Aya - spelled "blue" wrong.

S - Sailor Change Star - spelled "Starlights" wrong in the 1st sentence. Sailor Quartetto spelled "Nehellenia" wrong a few times, "unconcious" is also spelled wrong. Sailor Star Yell - spelled "wings" wrong. Sapphire - spelled "sabotage", "manages" wrong. Shabon Spray - spelled "attack" wrong. Shine Snow Illusion - spelled "arc" wrong. Shun Hayase - spelled "Crystal" wrong. Silent Glaive - forgot to add a word inbetween "The ___ is". Silence Wall - spelled "shields" wrong. You have double entries of Silence Wall. Soft Ice Cream Shop Bob Floy - "thermo phobia" is two words. Starseeds - spelled "crystalized" wrong. Star Serious Laser - spelled "front" wrong. Stephanie Beard and Stephanie Morganstern - spelled "actress wrong". Submarine Reflection and Submarine Violon Tide - spelled "appears" wrong.

T - Takarazuka Revue - there are often two different spellings of Michiru Kaioh's last name...Kaioh and Kaiou. Throughout your encylopedia you call her Kaioh, this is the first time I've seen you use Kaiou. You might want to change it back to Kaioh. Talismans - spelled "legendary" wrong. Tellun - wrong usage of "its" in the 1st sentence. Tea and Coffee Tour de Corse - another different spelling for Zoicite! Pick one (Zoycite, Zoicite, Zoisite)! Titanium Kerokko - spelled "called" wrong in the last sentence. Transformation - remember to capitalize "Starlights". Transformation Brooch - spelled "front", "encounter" wrong. Tsutomu Asai - spelled "volleyball" wrong. Type Two Daimon - spelled "defense" wrong.

U - Great job on this section.

V - Venus Love Me Chain - add a space inbetween "danger, such". Lots of Sailorvenus information, it will be great to see all the other senshi have their attacks/henshins noted in the encylopedia later on.

W - Witches 5 - in every entry I have seen you spell Mimette with only one T (except for this very important entry)...which one is correct? Spelled "area" wrong. Remember to add a space inbetween "diamons. This".

X - Nicely done.

Y - Yamagishi - "becomes" does not need an apostrophe.

Z - I'm done! Huzzah! So much Sailormoon information is now tucked inside my brain.

usage - I suggest you put this Usage page before your entire Encyclopedia. This way the visitor will know how to navigate your site before they actually see it.

Overall
This is definitely the largest site I have ever reviewed for in all my 5 years of reviewing sites. I think it's time for me to retire. Thank you for presenting a well-thought out Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon encylopedia. Your encylopedia offers an enormous amount of information for any new fan or even for those who have been following the series since it began. There are a bundle of spelling and grammar errors that can be fixed very easily as well as perhaps some information you need to re-read and fix up on. I can see all the dedication that you put in the site. Great job and good luck in completing your BSSM encylopedia.

The Oracle's Reply to this Review
Thanks for reviewing me! Yeesh, I had no idea that there were that many random errors in there. Most of the content of the encyclopaedia was written 3-7 years ago (many before I even had the site!), so it is constantly being revised. I'm trying to give every entry its own individual page... so the info on the individual pages (which you'll find as links in the encyclopaedia) is what's MOST accurate. I'm just glad to see that most things were typographical errors, not errors in actual information. I like having people look over my encyclopaedia from time-to-time to tell me what typos they see.

Just a note about the spelling of the name "Aluminum Seiren." This is CORRECT... "Aluminum Siren" is wrong. This was used in the English translation of the manga, but that translation is completely inaccurate in so many ways. It even calls Ptilol "Petit Roll!" "Seiren" is a Greek word, and is approximated as such in Japanese script. This is similar to the name "Peruru." The French word, "Perle" is what is being approximated by the Japanese script. Why not just say, Pearl," the English word? Because that's not what was intended. The French word was intended. Similarly, the Greek word "Seiren" was intended, not the English word "Siren."

Anyhow, thanks so much for looking over my site and pointing out all my weird typos (why am I forever typing "the" twice?). I will most certainly look over what you've said and make appropriate changes! Thanks SO much!

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